Essential Emotional Skills for Authors
Apr 06, 2026Welcome to the third in our four-part series of essential skills for published novelists!
As a reminder, the overall categories are:
- Essential Writing Skills
- Essential Marketing Skills
- Essential Emotional Skills (today's post!)
- Essential Business Skills
Before I share the essential emotional skills, another quick reminder:
Please do not let this list overwhelm you.
There is no hurry to master these skills. You can approach them one at a time, and you don't need to master something before you move on.
You'll try things. See what works. Make adjustments. Try again. Over time, you'll figure out what works best for you and your unique process.
This also isn't an exhaustive list.
I intentionally limited myself to the top 3-4 skills per category, and I picked the ones that come up most often in my conversations with authors. There are more skills involved in creating a sustainable, joy-centered career than what I could include here.
If you want tailored support for your author goals, you can click here to learn more about coaching.
Okay, let's dive in!
Intentional Self-Talk
How you talk about what happens in your author career has a massive impact on the way you feel about it.
This is true both in how you talk to yourself and how you talk to your writer friends and other people about your career.
The human brain is designed to skew negative as a way to keep us safe from potential dangers.
While this is meant to be protective, in our modern world, it often backfires.
We end up finding reasons to panic when things are going well. And when things don't go according to plan (which happens more than we'd like in publishing!), our brains can spiral into doomsville in 2.2 seconds flat.
In order to have an enjoyable author career--no matter what's going on in the industry at large--you have to make intentional choices about how you frame the narrative of your career.
I recently taught a free workshop on how to do that. You can watch the replay here.
Defining Success
Part of what makes publishing so emotionally challenging is the way the bar of success is constantly moving.
First, you think you'll feel successful once you get an agent.
Then when you're on sub.
But wait! You can't feel successful until you get an actual book deal.
And then once you have a deal, the bar rises again.
And again. And again. And again.
In order to feel good about your career, it's important to define success in a way that suits your unique goals.
And pro tip: don't set your only definition as the top 1% of author success.
You can be incredibly successful without ever hitting a bestseller list or winning an award. There's success to be had at every stage of your career, and there's lots to feel proud of along the way.
Celebrate Every Step
One of the core things I teach my clients is how (and why and when!) to celebrate.
Short answer: celebrate every single time you finish a writing session, every time you reach a career or manuscript milestone, and any time something big happens, too.
Each time you celebrate after a writing session, you reinforce that writing is something you actually enjoy.
And when your body remembers that writing is enjoyable, you're less likely to struggle with procrastination going forward.
Celebration doesn't have to be complicated.
It can be as simple as texting a friend "I met my writing goals today!" or taking 30 seconds to write yourself a note about what went well in your writing session and then feeling the good feels vibrating through your body.
This ties in with the intentional self talk, too.
Telling yourself "you did such a good job today, love!" feels so much better than, "ugh, you're so slow!"
Final Thoughts
You have more control over the emotional experience of your career than you think, and these foundational skills are a great place to start.
If you want custom support as you build your emotional resilience, click here to learn more about coaching.
Happy writing,
Isabel
PS - I currently have 2 spaces open for new private clients. Click here to learn more and schedule your free enrollment call.
PPS - Don't miss a single issue of Real Talk for Writers. CLICK HERE to sign up for the Real Talk newsletter. You'll receive an email every other Monday morning with the newest issue plus notifications about upcoming workshops.